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Our company has had a long-standing tradition of cast parties after almost every performance. This alternate lyric, sung to the tune of “Your Highness, There’s a Party at the Door,” was written by Holly Windle in recognition that this tradition sometimes has its “downside” … the parties are not always helpful to the health of the cast!
This song was performed at the Spring 2003 Last Gasp Cast Bash, by Kathryn Larsen and members of the chorus.
Chorus:
My goodness, there’s a party every show.
My goodness, every show there is a party.
Old timers now expect it,
So we do not dare neglect it,
Though it can be rather tedious, we know.
Though colds and throat infections may be rife,
Our post-performance gatherings are hearty.
And despite some cancellations,
There are many celebrations.
Oh, the theater is very much like life.
The theater is very much like life.
Baroness:
With feelings paradoxical I’m tossed.
These party opportunities are great,
But my sleep is necessary or I’m lost;
The show demands that I must concentrate.
So however many go, there is a quorum;
And those party themes are trouble, so ignore ‘em.
If you leave by midnight, thanks to good decorum,
Your energy you’ll thus invigorate.
Chorus:
Oh, however many go, there is a quorum;
If the themes are too inscrutable, ignore ‘em,
But it’s hard to leave by midnight with decorum.
Instead we count on simply sleeping late.
Whether the “after the show” parties are good for the health of the cast or not, they do take place and occasionally get a bit out of hand!
The following alternate lyric song, was also performed at the Spring 2003 Last Gasp Cast Bash, by Kathryn Larsen with members of the chorus.
Chorus:
Good Heavens, there’s a party on the floor!
Good Heavens, on the floor there is a party!
They are making such a racket,
And we don’t think we can hack it,
‘Cause we’ve been through all this nonsense twice before!
They’re singing G & S songs in the hall
We cannot understand without a gloss’ry.
So, we better call the super,
And tell her to bring a trooper
Or our baby won’t get any sleep at all!
Our baby won’t get any sleep at all!
Baroness:
With rage and indignation now I burn!
That Wally and his troupe are such a load!
They’re singing The Mikado near the ferns
I should really tell them all to “hit the road!”
Oh! Whatever they may do, it’s too much trouble;
I should throw them out or next month’s rent I’ll double!
Some have filched my stash of Double Bubble!
And they’re watching ancient Star Trek episodes.
Chorus:
Oh! Whatever we may do, we’re not much trouble!
But, we like to watch cartoons with Barney Rubble
Yes, we’re really, really fond of Double Bubble!
Right after we eat mince pie a la mode.
The following alternate lyric (another of Holly Windle’s) goes to the tune of The Prince of Monte Carlo’s “Roulette Song” and recognizes the “sad and sorry” lot of understudies. While a vitally necessary part of a production, they end up doing all of the work of a principal, but get none of the accolades!
This song was performed at the Spring 2003 Last Gasp Cast Bash.
The Prince of Monte Carlo:
Take my advice and spare your heart:
Don’t understudy any part.
At once distrust the offered chance
To learn the music, words, and dance.
For once you say you’ll do the role,
The thing is out of your control.
You get no glory, but – oh, yikes!
You must go on if illness strikes.
Allons encore, garçons fillettes -
It’s like a game of Russian roulette.
Hola, hola, hola, hola, hola!
Faisons nos jeux,
Allons, oh, merde
I’m not prepared
Golly, I’m scared.
Rien n’va plus!
La croix de guerre et D’Oyle Carte,
(Oh) Ready and waiting’s an art(e).
The understudies squirm and fret:
We all must play roulette!
A little germ’s a threat indeed;
My happiness it may impede.
I call up Ethan every day
To ascertain if he’s okay.
And if perchance he starts to wheeze,
Just cut the trio, and – oh please -
I’ll keep my calm and will not chafe
Here in the chorus where it’s safe.
Allons encore, garçons fillettes
It’s like a game of Russian roulette.
Hola, hola, hola, hola, hola!
Faisons nos jeux,
Oh, à la carte,
I know the part
Almost by heart.
Rien n’va plus!
Tra la la la – I’ve dodged the bullet!
The chicken is me – I’m a pullet.
From villain down to sweet soubrette,
We all must play roulette.
Chorus:
From villain down to sweet soubrette,
We all must play roulette!
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