Sung to the tune of “My Papa, He Keeps Three Horses”
The Chorus’ song from Act I
Written by Mark Alt
Performed by James Brooks, Stephen Hage, Dean Laurance and Waldyn Benbenek

 I don’ want yer cell phones ringin’!
 Here’s da message we deliver:
 If it goes off while he’s singin’
 Someone ends up in da river!